As a teacher, one of the most difficult things I had to do was come up with comments for the report card. Of course, when I taught in High School, no comments were needed. A simple number grade, like 92, was sufficient. Sometimes the administration got it into their heads that a number was too defining, it needed to be something with more breadth, like a B+. I know that in one school where I taught, there were to be no minuses. No one was an A-; if their average was 90-94, it was to be listed as an A. Having a minus after their grade was too demeaning and threatened to deflate their self-esteem. But I digress. I began talking about comments. I want to share with you the best one I ever wrote for a 5th grade student:
Samantha’s strong apathy is evident in class and is counterproductive to the acquisition of knowledge. (Translation: Samantha doesn’t give a shit and isn’t learning anything!)
My favorite note from a parent in a rural community where I taught 7th grade math was: Sorry that Billy doesn’t have his homework today; the goat ate it.
Here’s a witticism that I love: The best of us talk about ideas; most of us talk about things; the worst of us talk about people. Now doesn’t that just say it all? It kinda runs the gamut from TED talks to People Magazine.
Before I sign off, will everyone who believes in telekinesis please raise my hand?